Image source Men’s Fitness
While this story hit the news circuit earlier this year, I somehow just came across it; consider this my personal public service announcement for any guy contemplating getting a tat on his privates who, like me, missed this tale of woe the first time ‘round.
When someone gets a tattoo, I think one of the first questions people ask you is “ooh did it hurt?!” I can’t imagine what this no-named 21-year-old Iranian man would say after the tattoo on his penis caused him to have a permanent erection… (From a glass half full perspective, at least he can still get it up, right?)
Tattoos are said to be addickting (sorry, had to!), but on your male parts…really? After realizing his woodies were lasting a little too long, he attempted to have surgery to make the thing go down, but it was unsuccessful; the ink had penetrated too deep. But, because he can still live a pain-free, sex-full life, the man has decided to live with his condition. I can’t imagine having to explain that one.
Oh and just to add to this ridiculous disaster, the tattoo reads “borow be salaamat,” meaning “good luck with your journeys” followed by the letter “M,” the initial of his girlfriend’s first name. Trust me dude, it’s going to be the trip of a lifetime!
Posted by Dorothy
Image souce ta·ta·toos
Designed to highlight a woman’s best assets (her cleverness and cleavage, of course!) ta·ta·toos are the latest accessory for your breasts. No, really.
According to TheGloss.com, for $9.95 you can purchase temporary tattoos that offer two-part catchy sayings (think “Lucky You”, “I’m Yours, Be Mine”, “Satisfaction Guaranteed”) to put on “the girls.” Getting married? Imagine the surprise on your new hubby’s face when you disrobe on your wedding night to show off the words “Just Married”…yep, on your boobs. Bun in the oven? Tell the world by wearing a low-cut top and ta·ta·toos that read “Guess What? I’m Pregnant.”
Classless? Yes. Money maker? Sadly, yes, too.
Let’s just say, I’m thankful my boobs like being mute.
Posted by Alyssa
We’ve already covered the topic of overzealous designer fanaticism, but what of those folks with an unhealthy infatuation with their favorite celeb (my love of Justin Beiber aside)? Just ask Miljenko Parserisas Bukovic, a 56-year-old newspaper vendor in Mexico who boasts 82 tattoos of Julia Roberts’ face on his torso, arms, legs and places I don’t care to think about. Evidently, Julia’s extra-terrestrial cleavage in Erin Brokovich was enough to light this dude’s fire, prompting him to spend upwards of $100K to have the starlet’s visage inked onto every square inch of his doughy bod. Not that I can blame him—I just re-watched that movie a few weeks ago—holy boob canal, Batman!
Now that, my friends, is what we call dedication with a capital D.
Posted by Abby
I love a good designer item…yes, those back-to-back C’s (Chanel, not Coach, you amateur) and up and down G’s excite me.
As much as I enjoy rocking designer accessories, there comes a time when enough is enough—and no, I don’t mean sporting a Burberry umbrella & Burberry rain boots at the same time—I mean THIS!
This, my friends, is plain old tacky, not to mention, HORRIFYING! I love my Louis, but not enough to have little LV’s tattooed on my body with ink and needles. Seriously, this guy should get free Louis Vuitton leather goods for life—he’s a walking advertisement.
I’d say the only silver lining with this is that he chose the classic print and NOT the Murakami!
Posted by Alyssa
If pearls and classic woven suits aren’t really your thing, maybe Chanel’s new temporary tattoos will make you a fan of this luxe brand.
On March 1st (today!) “Les Trompe L’Oeil de Chanel Temporary Skin Art” will launch exclusively at Selfridges and you can bet that fashionistas and rockers alike will be hopping the first flight to London and stocking up. And if you can’t commit to a plane ticket, they’re also available at Chanel.com.
For $75, you can adorn yourself with an assortment of 55 different designs including the oh-so-recognizable double C’s, chains, pendants, birds, blossoms and pearls. Leave it to Chanel to make sporting temporary tattoos in everyday fashion surprisingly un-weird and somehow, completely trendy.
Who knew tattoos would be the latest accessory in the world of couture?
Posted by Alyssa