Show Us Your O-Face, Mr. President

Image source About.com

Earlier this year, Match.com conducted its 2nd annual Singles in America survey, taking a comprehensive look at the lifestyles, attitudes, and ideals of 6,000 singles aged 21+ across the country. While it seems that every other study out there contradicts the one before it, the results in this case are pretty entertaining, albeit not really groundbreaking. Not only do we learn women hate bad sex (no kidding?!), but it turns out that ambition is a turn-on (wow!), and we get pickier the older we get (go figure!).

Probably the most intriguing finding here is that Republicans reported the highest frequency of orgasm of all survey participants…yet also copped to having the least amount of sex. Over 50% of self-identified conservative Republicans admitted — anonymously & online — to reaching climax almost every time they had sex, while just 40% of liberal Democrats said the same.

With this being an election year, I can’t help but wonder what those running for office might think about this. On the one hand, a sexually satisfied president could make for an efficient one (hey, Clinton did ok)…on the other, maybe the reason our country is so totally screwed — no pun intended — is ‘cause Bush spent too much time in his wife’s. (Wait..what? Oh, yes, we di-id…)

That being said, this is just a singles survey…

Posted by Haley

Welcome to the Sh*t Show

This year already promises to be chock full of political antics and gesturing guaranteed to leave you with that “I think I just threw up in my mouth” feeling. We’re 11 days into 2010 and dominating local and national media outlets is the terror bombing attempt on Christmas Day. President Obama put on a brave face and laid the blame for the failed intelligence that could have entirely prevented the bombing attempt at his feet with a noble declaration: “I’m less interested in passing out blame than I am in learning from and correcting mistakes to make us safe. For ultimately, the buck stops with me.” Very noble, but just that and nothing more.

Should you need a quick refresher, highlights from the massive intelligence breakdown allowing this incident – several stemming from human errors – looks a bit something like this:

• Would-be bomber Umar Farouk AbdulMutallab’s name was reportedly misspelled throughout the intelligence report.
• Also, in the report, the flight number of the plane leaving Detroit with Mr. AbdulMutallab on board was listed as 153 in when it was actually flight number 253.
• The recorded date of correspondence with AbdulMuttalab’s father (who reached out to sound warning bells about his son’s potential actions) was recorded as November 18^th when it was, in fact, the 19^th.

Immediately following the incident, Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano hailed the foiled attempt as a sign that “the system worked.” Yeah, if we’re now solely relying on our passengers to apprehend suspiciously-behaving fellow travelers. Her faulty logic speaks to our larger shortcoming in regards to our national defense strategy. So far, every measure we’ve taken to strengthen security has been reactionary. When a deranged man attempted to blow himself up at an airport through his shoes, we decided all passengers must remove shoes at the security checkpoint. When the crazies tried to assemble a liquid bomb aboard a plane, we vastly decreased the amount of liquid each passenger can store in their carry-ons. Now, we’re implementing full-body scanners at airports to detect explosives and other hidden objects on people’s bodies. These are all good efforts. I’m fine with the inconveniences if it means safer flying standards for us all, but reactive measures alone will only lend to a lazy, shortsighted and costly approach to securing the safety and infrastructure of a nation.

It was a nice gesture on Mr. Obama’s part to remind us that any failure is one that ultimately rests with him but no heads rolled for the series of screaming errors that lead to this perfect storm. Instead, the same intelligence team has now been tasked with reforming our current security system. Using yourself as the scapegoat, Mr. President, is not a genuine measure of transparency. So, cut the fat and sink our hard-earned tax dollars into more venerable intelligence efforts, like infiltrating the sh*t out of Al Qaeda and scaling terrorist outfits, lest this incident, coupled with the detestable Salahi fiasco and your insistence on trying known 9/11 terrorists as civilians (in New York, no less) cause the world to think this administration’s approach to security reckless.

Posted by Elizabeth